According to greek methodology Narcissus was a very beautiful hunter; son of the river-god Cephissus. Narcissus was so in love with him self, harsh and negligent to those who around him that one day the sprite Nemesis who was responsible for freeing earth from all arrogant souls against god came to Narcissus and showed him a pond, asked him to look into it. Seeing his own reflection Narcissus was astonished and mesmerized by the beauty he saw; unable to leave his beautiful reflection he died consumed by his own arrogance and beauty. That’s where the word Narcissist came from.
According to the English Dictionary Narcissist is: “
As for the Psychology dictionary Narcissist is ” narcissism,
Todays article was inspired by the (2015) movie “True Story” starting Jonah Hill and James Franco. The movie based of true event story (pun not intended). A story for the mass murder Christian Longo and the New York Time author Michael Finkel. Longo was accused on January 11th, 2002 for murdering his 3 children and wife. Two of his children where dumped in the river, tied to a heavy rock and set to drown in the river; as for the other child and wife they where crushed and placed forcefully into a traveling bag and dumped into the river. The child was still alive inside the bag as she suffocated to death trying to escape. He was sentence to death row in the state of Oregon, US and estimated to be excited sometime between 2016 and 2017. Longo’s case is exceptional as no one tell now including him knows the reason behind the way and the reason he killed his family.
That’s not the only exceptional thing about Mr. Longo the fact that He faked his name to match the NY Time reporter; in order to get him on his side, by writing a book on his life; giving him [Longo] a more human side so people can sympathies with him. Longo did not stop here as he further manipulated the court, made false statements, and twisted the truth so many times it was obvious he was hiding something. He was later diagnosed as having Narcissistic personality disorder, which what I would like to discuss briefly.
NPD or Narcissistic personality disorder is a psychological illness that hit about 1% of the population. Psychologist still don’t know the exact reason to which someone can develop NPD however there are a couple of common reasons such as genetics [as it is highly hereditary], childhood abuse or trauma. NPD also vary in degree and could be destructive if mixed with other psychological traits such as Paranoia, and Aggression [ex: Hitler]. It is important to say that Narcism is a psychological trait meaning that it could be found mixed with other traits, vary in degree, and have different impact from person to person that’s why psychology is never the same from one person to the other; that’s what makes us unique.
If we looked at how many people claim that they have OCD as they have to arrange things accordingly we would find that more than 70% of population possess this trait however, if we want to be scientifically correct a person with OCD would have a dysfunctional life if he did not prefer the intended OCD task a number of desired times tell they can processed with life. And OCD person can’t live a normal me and you life because they have either to close the door 32 times each time they enter the house, or wash their hands exactly 16 times after food. Unfortunately , people associate their love to organizing things or the love to have an even number of everything as OCD. Rule of thumb if your OCD is not affecting your work, social, and normal life you do NOT have a OCD. Same goes to Narcism, lots of people believe they have NPD but they don’t, as more than 21% of people in this population suffer for the legal or normal dose of Narcism. We all have that ego, self admiration, or the love to be first at everything but just like OCD if its is not threatening your social life or work they you do NOT have a psychological disorder.
Just a couple of days ago I finish a book by Kluger J. called “The Narcissist Next Door” The author is a Times writer so the book is not much of a bold psychology/scientific language. The book spoke about how you can indicate Narcism in people you work with, sleep with, communicate with, and live with. Of course it is needless to say that the best way to identify NPD is if the person them self too a psychological test. But here are some things that would help you in finding and dealing with Narcissism.
Narcissism at work
The most common place to find Narcissism is at work and especially business, as the Narcissism soul thrive on ego, attention, and unfair competition. They tend to be the person that acts like they are listening to you just to find out that they came into your office just to ask for a favor, steal some ideas, get some information that they need. They are the people who never compliment you of something unless they need something from you, and as soon as they are past the need of your help they flip the face of hate, and disrespect. They are the boss who steals the idea that you’ve been working on for years just to get his way up, or the boss who blames you for a mistake that he did just to look innocent.
A narcissist never knows or identify himself as narcissist, he does not believe that what he is doing is wrong as his moral and immoral self is damaged. He does not know whats right and wrong when it comes to things he want to accomplish. That’s why he always thinks he is right and everything is never his fault. Example to that is Mr. Longo as after he killed his family he did not admit to what he did as wrong but instead he focused his energy towards the state of Oregon jail to why Death row prisoners can’t donate organs. He completely turned the table into making him look like he was working to do something great yet he still deny what he did to his children and wife. He wrote a book, published articles in the Times, and even started a foundation to help get the state jail to accept death row prisoners organ donations. He flipped his sentence to his advantage to make him look beloved and novel, but still deny what he did to his family as wrong. Strange people?!
Narcissism at Bed
Narcism has great charisma they are so good at presenting them selves that people fall in love with them and almost think of them as gods or perfect humans that they’ve been looking for. As Narcism always wants to be the best person in the spotlight, they fake care and love in relationships just to get what they want. whether they want to look like a perfect american family, satisfy their need, or get a favor out of someone. They well keep acting until they reach to what they need that’s when you turn the other face let the other person down in a blink of an eye and go after someone else. Leave their spouse behind shocked and confused as to what they did wrong how did paradise change into hell, what did they do wrong? was it something they did?
Narcissism in us
Narcism could never be stopped as society unfortunately promotes a person to be narcissist. Along side the fact that Narcissist are so charismatic giving them the upper hand of off spring a whole generation of that trait. It is just like all other psychological disorder but it is important to be educated about so people can avoid not having their heart-broken by a past beloved spouse, a bad boss, or a thief co-worker.
Link to NPD test: http://personality-testing.info/tests/NPI.php